Wel, dwi wedi bod yn yr UDA ers wythnos erbyn hyn. Siwrne weddol ddi-sdwr, newid ym Mharis a chael un o’r seddi yna sydd o flaen y drws argyfwng yn yr awyren. Coeliwch fi bobol, rhein ydi seti gorau yr awyren- mae ‘na gymaint o le i’ch coesa chi, getse chi ddawnsio sdep y glocsen rhwng y set a’r wal. Ac i unrhyw un sydd wedi bod a’r daith o fwy na ryw 5 awr mi allwch chi ddeallt mor werthfawr ydi pob modfedd ychwanegol o le! Wrth gwrs, fe gafwyd y siars arferol gan y fflait hosdes – “Are you willing and able to assist the cabin crew with the exit in case of emergency?” Mae’r ffaith eu bod nhw’n fodlon rhoi cyfrifoldeb dros y badau achub i Gymraes ddi-glem a Ffrancwr hanner dall yn deud yn glir faint o ffydd sydd genyn nhw yn ein siawns ni o oroesi tase’r awyren yn plymio tydi?
Ta waeth, fe gyrhaeddwyd heb orfod mentro ar yr un bad achub a’r peth cynta i wneud oedd mynd i nol y Social Security Number/Card holl bwysig. Ac fe’i cafwyd, heb fawr o sdwr. Mi ges i sgipio y ciw o tua 30 person oedd yn aros i gael J-1 (cerdyn dros dro i bobol sydd ddim yn ddinasyddion) a mynd i’r ciw byr yn lle, at y bobol oedd eisiau eu pensiwn a ballu. Arbed tua 2 awr o aros yn fane! Wedi f’arfogi a phasbort, social security number a ffon Americanaidd (yn teimlo fel drug dealer neu ysbiwr efo 2 basport a throw-away ffon!) mi es i i chwilio am waith. A dyma fi, tostiwr tost y Red Cottage Diner. Da de. Mae o yn bres tydi?
A dyne’n hanes i hyd yn hyn. O, na dwi wedi anghofio y newyddion mawr. Bu bron i ni gael ein byta gan Snapping Turtle! Y creaduriaid mileinaf, peryclaf a hyllaf i grwydro dyfroedd daear http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFDDYWKXeNQ Stwff hynllefe chi bois. Mi roedden ni’n nofio’n y llyn ‘ma o’r enw “Dennis Pond”. Mi roedd hi’n noson dawel, mi roedd na sdorm ar fin torri, mi roedd yr awyr yn llwyd a phawb, heblaw amdano ni wedi mynd adre cyn iddi ddechra t’ranu. Mi roedd fy nau gefnder a chyfnither yn eistedd yn y dwr, ar fin nofio i ben arall y llyn (mae o tua hanner milltir o hyd, felly mae nofio yna ac yn ol yn ymarfer corf bach da) pan yn sydyn dyma na rywbeth yn codi o berfeddion tywyll y dwr, tua ugain llath o’r lan. Mi roedd o fel pen Tegid Foel- mi gododd o o’r dwr a troi ei ben yn araf, a’i lygid duon o’n syllu arna ni. Safodd pawb yn llonydd, wedi rhewi’n gorn, “megis trindod faen” os buodd na drindod faen erioed. Mi arhosodd y pen yno am ryw ugain eiliad, yn sbio arna ni, cyn syddo’n ol i mewn i’r dŵr yn araf bach. Mi ddadmerodd pawb yn syth a rhedeg allan o’r llyn fel geifr ar dranne, ond ar y lan mi drodd pawb yn ol i sbio. Yn fy mhen mi ro’n i’n clywed cerddoriaeth Jaws wrth i ni syllu- duh…..duh…….duh…..duh…..duh…duh…duh..duh..duh.duh.duhduh bam a dyma’r pen yn codi eto, wedi nofio tua 30 llath i’r chwith ar hyd ymyl y llyn. O yr arswyd. Dichon deud na fydda i yn nofio yn fana eto ar frys mawr…
Wel, I’ve been in the US a week now. The journey was quite strait forward, changed in Charles De Gaulle, and found myself sat in those seats next to the emergency-exit/lifeboat/slide-thingy doors. And oh my gosh those are the best seats on the plane! Miles of leg room- I mean you could have a whole seal sat there between you and the wall, clapping and balancing a ball. Anyone whose spent any time crouched like a sardine in those tiny aeroplane seats will appreciate how valuable each extra inch of room is! Of course we got the usual spiel from the air hostess- “Are you willing and able to assist the cabin crew with the exit in case of emergency?”. Well, if the flight companies are ready to place the fate of their passengers in the hands of a clue-less Welsh girl and a half-blind Frenchman, it says a lot about how much faith the companies have in their emergency procedures.
Anyway, we arrived successfully without incident, and the first task was to go get the all-important Social-Security Number/Card. And gotten it was, without much ado. I got to skip the 30-person long que of Europeans waiting to get a J-1 (short term social security for foreigners). Instead I got to go to the short 8-person que made up of pensioners etc, saving me about 2 hours of my life. Armed with passport, social security number and ‘cell’ phone (and feeling like a drug dealer or a spy with two passports and a throw-away phone) I went to find a job. And find one I did. Meet the new toast toaster of the Red Cottage Diner. Hey, it’s money no?
And that’s all I have to say up to now. Oh wait, no, I’ve forgotten the Really big news- we almost got eaten by snapping turtles! The most fierce, ferocious, ugly and dangerous animal ever to swim in the earth’s waters. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFDDYWKXeNQ). The stuff of nightmares. We were swimming in this lake called “Dennis Pond”. It was a quiet night, a storm was about to break and the sky was as gray as iron and everyone had gone home before the thunder came. We were the only ones left. My cousins were in the lake, ready to swim across (The lake is about half a mile long, so swimming there and back is a good workout) when suddenly we saw something raise from the depth of the water, around twenty feet from the shore. It looked like a sea monster or a strange piece of driftwood. It turned its head toward us, watching us with its balck eyes. We all stood there, frozen, watching it watching us. It stayed there for about twenty seconds before sinking back into the water. Everyone started moving imedeatly, running and splashing as fast as they could out of the water. At the shore we all stood watching, with the Jaws theme running through our heads duh…..duh…….duh…..duh…..duh…duh…duh..duh..duh.duh.duhduh suddenly there it was again, 30 feet to the left. Oh the horror. Won’t be swimming there again in a hurry…
mae'r byd yn hances boced... 